Pirates

U mad, bro?: Fans rally around Mike Tomlin and Kedon Slovis, lash out about Pirates and … craft beer?

Tim Benz
Slide 1
AP
Pittsburgh Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin waves to fans before the first half of an NFL preseason football game against the Jacksonville Jaguars, Saturday, Aug. 20, 2022, in Jacksonville, Fla.

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The No. 1 tip I give to young sports journalists entering the workplace these days is to diversify.

Get experience in front of the camera, on the radio and in print. Do some play-by-play. Try anchoring. Host a talk show or podcast. Join the student newspaper.

Apparently, my readers are already up to speed on the importance of diversification. They are honked off about the Steelers, Pitt, the Pirates and even women’s tennis — all at the same time!

Oh, and craft beer. That, too.

Let’s start spreading the angst in this week’s “U mad, bro?”


We begin with someone who didn’t like last week’s “U mad, bro?” It’s a spicy tweet from a guy who calls himself “Father O’Neil.” He’d prefer I never express criticism of Steelers coach Mike Tomlin again.

And y’all have the audacity to complain about coaches not saying (expletive) to the press. Weasely (expletive) backbiters looking to stab Caesar. #Hubris

First of all, “Father,” that’s some salty language coming from a man of the cloth.

Secondly, I may not know much about history. But I’m pretty sure that Caesar never would’ve tied the Detroit Lions at home.

#EtTuMason?


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Steelers fans weren’t the only ones upset with me in last week’s “U mad, bro?” Pirates fans were, too. But David has my back.

Hey, Tim, don’t let the Pirates fans get to you. I mean if they actually knew anything about baseball they wouldn’t be Pirates fans.

That may be true, David. But if they are Pirates fans, then they do know anger, aggravation and irritation. In fact, no one knows it better than a Pirates fan.

And it appears they want me to share that with them.


This person wants to slow the hype surrounding Steelers rookie wide receiver George Pickens.

What??!! How dare you! You take Limas Sweed’s name out of your mouth and you put some respect on it!

Best block in Stillers history, don’tcha know!

Since the Steelers are retiring numbers these days, I say, “Why stop at Franco Harris’ No. 32?” Take 14 off of Pickens’ back before he sullies the memory of the “true” No. 14 in Steelers history with mere Offensive Rookie-Of-The-Year-level play.

Long live Limas!


William H. responded to some of my thoughts on the Pirates Hall of Fame. I argued that the likes of Dick Groat, Vern Law and Elroy Face — all of whom are at least 91 years of age — should be inducted as soon as possible so they can be assured of enjoying the honor.

Perhaps the bigger question should be, why did they wait 135 years to create a HOF class, and why now? Stargell retired in ’82 and Parker left in ’83. Forty years have passed. Why now? Too little, too late. Better to have left well enough alone.”

I get where you are coming from, William. I guess I never give it much thought. But, yes, it’s something that could’ve been created decades ago. At least when PNC Park opened in 2001.

That said, it’s still better to do it now than not at all. I just would’ve inducted those three guys while they are all still alive instead of inducting 16 men posthumously for the inaugural class.


This reader thinks I didn’t give enough credit to Pitt quarterback Kedon Slovis after his team’s win in the Backyard Brawl because I praised the Panthers pass-catchers for gobbling up so many yards after the catch.

Actually, “decent” is exactly the word I’d use to describe Slovis’ debut.

Decent. Pretty good. At times, impressive. I believe I clearly indicated that in my column by complimenting his stats and his game-tying drive.

Geez, Pat Narduzzi was harder on him for the sacks than I was. But, hey, if you wanna call him Joe Montana after one start, you go right ahead.

That’s pretty typical of the response I get from Pitt fans whenever I write something positive about the Panthers. Instead of just taking the applause at face value, it’s always more constructive to find a slight somewhere else in the story and seize on that so you can manufacture a media conspiracy against your team and advance your “nobody gives us credit” agenda.

But I know, I know. You aren’t being paranoid if everybody is really out to get you.


Finally, here’s a tweet I sent out during Serena Williams’ last tennis match on Friday.

Here’s one of the responses I got.

Let me ask you, folks. Do you think his alternate spelling of “Laurenceville” is just a misspelling, or is he underscoring his own “anti-hipster” working-class-hero ethos, here?

My gut says, “Go with ‘Choice A.’” But I’m also inclined to give “Mr. Hardscrabble-boro” some credit for an attempt at sarcasm.

Anyway, I don’t want to get on a rant here, but it always bothers me when a macro-beer guzzler plays the “you’re less of a man because you drink craft beer” card.

Like, have you ever had an IPA? Or are they too bitter, hoppy and full bodied for your delicate, little taste buds that are only exposed to the, uh, “smooth drinkability” of “fill-in-the-blank” Macro Lite that’s twice the water and half the alcohol content?

Good for you. A manly guy like you would never put tennis on instead of football. We get it. And you just shot-gunned a six-pack to get drunk, whereas one of those hipsters may get just as buzzed off “only” two IPAs. And maybe with the money you save, you could buy an apostrophe or two for your next tweet.

That’ll put hair on your chest. Your testosterone is just oozing through your tweet, you manly, lumberjack son-of-a-gun.

But, like I said, I don’t want to get on a rant …

What? You thought only you were allowed to get mad in “U mad, bro?” And only about sports?

C’mon. Please!

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